Thursday, May 8, 2014

My 10 Moms

(Originally written September 2011. Two months before Bean arrived!)


As my stomach swells more and more each day, I'm reminded that this whole kid thing is really real.

really.

I'm going to be a mom.
Moments of euphoria and sheer panic usually follow.


What do I know about being a mother? (When I was eight, I had a goldfish for a week and within that time frame, forgot I had a goldfish...my past caretaker forays have been subpar at best)

Let's rewind even more for a minute.
vipppperriiibbbbirrrrrrrrib
{yes. that would be my rewind sound effect}


...


In 1988, a man and a woman had a baby. A baby they knew had to live with another family in order to be loved.
In 1988, another man and a woman prayed for a baby. A baby they knew they had plenty of love to give. 

Hooray! That baby was me. Is me. Was me? Officially adopted at 6 months.(I looked just like that little guy up there. I know cause I've seen the ONE photo I have of me at that age. All you second children of the 80s know what I'm talking about)


Remember, life has a way of getting really real though.
Cue those moments of euphoria and sheer panic.

In 1999, my mom passed away, completely out of the blue.
With just little ol' me in a houseful of boys, many other women in my life stepped in to help.
Even the manliest of men shudder at the thought of going at it alone into the world of training bras, periods, and the birds and bees with an 11 year old daughter.
P.S. My Dad is my hero.

So, my aunts, grandma, and best friends' moms soon became chauffeurs, cooks, and fashion consultants.

They saved me from some awkward months of mismatched clothes and egg and cheese burritos for dinner 5x per week.

Note: My Dad's egg and cheese burritos are seriously still one of my favorite things in this world.

They also saved my Dad from the dreaded puberty talk.
Thanks Aunt Mars.
I will never forget that beach trip, you sly fox, you. 
"Oh, on the way, let's listen to this tape I just.so.happened. to bring." 


Then, my Dad got his smile back.
He began laughing again.


Her name is Rachael.

And they recently celebrated their 10 year anniversary.

...

So, back to me. Preparing to be someone's mom.

When
I've had a mom who couldn't keep me.
and a mom who had to leave me.

And
I now have a mom who needed me as much as I needed her. 

Confused yet?


Perhaps I've learned grace.

A beautiful goodness that shines a light in any of those dark complicatedly confusing places.




I think Baby Bean and I will be just fine.

xoxo

{Bon Bon}







46 comments:

Rissy said...

aww what an incredibly sweet post.

You took tragedies and found blessings in them! I agree that you and baby bean will be more than fine ; )


CarissaExplainsItAll

Noelani said...

Beautiful story. Thanks for sharing :) I'm sure you will be an amazing mother ;)

Mia Helen said...

This is so beautiful! Thank you so much for sharing a little bit of your story!

Chloe said...

This is so beautiful and sweet and honest.
I love that you find blessings in your tragedies, just as Rissy said.

Belly B said...

The way you wrote this was just beautiful. You're going to be a wonderful mother. I can't wait to see pictures of your baby!

Belly B :)

Ashley said...

This post is just too sweet! Your story is beautiful. You'll be a fabulous mother! Thanks for sharing!

Marjorie said...

What a great post! You will make a good mom :)

Mommyblogger said...

Your going to be a fantastic momma...just wait & see. It's going to be much more natural than you could ever imagine!

mary said...

Bonnie, you give me chills. You are so special and full of grace and magic. You will be an excellent mommy! The best! Aww, MMMMMMMMMMMMMmommy!!!! Thank you for sharing ;) xox!

Carrie said...

That's really sweet. <3

wildchild said...

thank goodness for people who step in as pseudo-parents. i bet they're so excited to see you become a mother too :) you'll be just great i bet, thanks to these women.

Miss ALK said...

What a sweet post!! <3 I am sure that Baby Bean will ve *very* well loved ;-)

Have a great day!

xoxo Miss ALK

Rachel said...

i did not know that you were a fellow adoptee.

what a precious thing that is. <3

beautiful post. this Bean of yours will be loved beyond measure.

Tysie said...

What a beautiful sentiment! You are going to be one amazing mama yourself!!! Lucky bean!

Leah said...

I wish you all the best on this journey and that you would be blessed by your little bean.

xo L.

Stephanie said...

You two will be just fine. You have a wonderful husband to support you and an amazing network of moms to help you along the way. What an exciting time for you and your family!

Mateya said...

What a precious story...you are going to be a fantastic mom!

Erin said...

This is a truly beautiful post. You will be a great mom. I'm so happy and excited for you!

Lauren Margaret said...

Aww! My mom situation is nothing like yours, but I do feel like I've been brought up with many moms - grandma, aunts, friends' moms, mom's friends. It truly is a blessing.

Someone said to me once that those nine months aren't just to let the bean grow - it's to allow you to get used to the idea of being a mom.

You'll be great :)

Michelle said...

You always find the good in so many things! What a beautiful post!

You're going to be such a great mom! xoxo

Becca said...

So sweet! Umm can you imagine what your hair would have looked like had it just been your dad that whole time? It would prob be worse than boy haircuts...I remember my dad trying to do my hair when I stayed with him and it was not good!

Emma Frances said...

You will be a wonderful mother. :) It's amazing how many people raised us/shaped our lives

Girl of The Grove said...

I think you and bean will be just fine, too! : )

Melu103 said...

what an amazing post
it made me smile :)
i grew up having more than one
mom too. Mom had to work all the
time so grandma aunts and mom's
friend were a big part of my life.

I am so grateful that mom
had all the support from them,
they always made sure i had
everything i needed.

:) You'll be a great mom!
Can't wait to see the baby <3




kisses from california
www.onlyaflightaway.blogspot.com

Sarah Frills4Thrills said...

this is a beautiful story,bonnie! I loved reading it and because you've had so many examples of what a wonderful "mother" is, you will be a great one yourself!

kira said...

This is a lovely post, you are going to be a great mom!

Jennifer Rod said...

what a beautiful story bon bon. i think you'll be just fine as a mommy.

Lindsay R said...

Incredible story. You will make a fine mother, I can already tell.

Lindsay

Libby said...

that post was very very sweet :) the little boy i nanny for is adopted so I have a very special place in my heart for adoption stories! and i'm sure you'll be a fabulous mom, esp since you have nannying experience..it will make it that much easier!

Jennifer said...

This is such a precious story! You are going to be a great mom girlie!

el.vi. said...

Gosh this post has blown me away. You will be a wonderful mom..and you are so blessed to have so many people around you raise you. It takes a community to raise a child.

Jessica Holly said...

This is so sweet and inspiring! I'm sure you'll be a great mom!

Michaela said...

Thanks for sharing this! What a tough few years you must have had, but love that your aunt stepped in for the talk! I freaked out on my mom when she told me about how you make a baby. I told her, NO mom, you just take a pill to get preggo...that's all. Clearly I was in denial!
You will be a wonderful mama (:

leigh said...

Wow, Bon, I love you even more! This post really touched my heart--that is one blessed baby bean! :)
Love, Leigh

Sara B said...

so beautiful :) what a blessing to have all those women in your life, and what a special and grace-filled heart you have to look at it all in such a positive way. you will be a wonderful mother!!

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katie [the bright life] said...

Oh my, Bonnie. I hope no one walks into my office right now because I'm CRYING. This is so sweet. It's crazy how God shapes us and prepares in ways we could have never imagined. You will be such a good mama, especially knowing grace so deeply. Thanks for bringing a smile (and tears) to my face this morning. Xoxo, Katie

caz said...

Love this post...
You're going to be a great mom...
xx

Tamara said...

Beautiful story and gracefully told!
You baby is blessed to have you as a mom.

A Beautiful Mess said...

congrats! so so sweet and exciting!

Courtney B said...

Oh this post is so touching! You are amazing Bonnie, and you're going to be the best momma in the world!!

Lana and Chris McCoy said...

Love you Bon Bon! This post totally made me cry. I hope Rachel gets to read this!

My Beautiful Life said...

This is so beautifully written. I had no idea you had been through so much.

You are going to be an amazing mom. Little bean is a lucky little kiddo.

Brooke Elyse said...

absolutely beautiful post.

xoxo

brooke elyse

bron @ baby space said...

this is such an amazing story. love it. and happy mother's day! x

Lana McCoy said...

Bonnie - this is beautiful! I have tears in my eyes now. Grace is life-giving. Miss you sister!

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