Friday, July 13, 2012

Green Grass

On any given morning, I wake up truly content. How could I not. With the daily reminder sweetly planted by my husband's good morning smooch, only to be one-upped by a slobbery smoochy mimic attempt by our baby.
Jolting my early a.m. reality yesterday was a bite on the butt.
from baby. 
Suffice it to say, "content" is an understatement.

a la living fully in the here and the now.

Of course, my Something Somewhere Someday dreams are floating about, as carefree and innocent as those fuzzy dandelion seeds blowing by the winds of hopeful abandon.
A few are silly. Anne of Avonlea-esque. Full of drama and spirit plus a tinge of sarcasm. 
Some are sincere. Stemming from grace filled experiences and brimming with mad scientist-ish inspiration. 
Many are secret. Even yet to be discovered by me. 
"Until the stars align just so," taunts the world. 
"We'll see about that," declares you know Who. 

A promise I cling to, deep within my core. 

late at night, most nights, since before I can remember, my mind races furiously against time. 
Spinning and churning.
My main competition is myself. 
Occasionally, I lose.

With a knock on the door of my heart,
those unwanted guests Fear and Doubt enter in, crashing my party. 
They eat the last piece of cake and comment on how lame the DJ is. 

And for a moment, I believe it. 

For a few moments. 

Many moments. 

"girl's just wanna have fun" turns into "it's my party and i'll cry if i want to."
crap. the DJ is lame. 

Thankfully, Truth, although fashionably late, always shows up. 
Spikes the punch. 
Gathers a conga line, busts open the pinata, and pins the tail on the donkey. 

Truth always wins. 
Ushering back in contentment. 

Party {and Dream} on. 


{Bon Bon}


Rissy said...

You my dear have quite a talent with words. I absolutely loved this post. It felt so personal.

And man oh man, do I know how you feel. Except for me, right now, I have my dreams about 4 feet ahead of me turned toward me saying "well come on now, let's get it going." You have already closed that 4 foot gap meeting your husband and having baby bean... I'm still getting there : ) Love the honesty though about still have those different dreams inside.


erica said...

your pictures are insaaaane. love them.


Rachel said...

Write a book...seriously!

katie michelle said...

Amen, girl! loved everything you said. those darn party crashers. we can never let them win!!

Alison said...

I know the Anne of Avonlea dreams that you speak of. There not bad but they are childish and overly romantic. At the same time it feels wrong to quash or give up on them because when they were first formed I wanted them with all of my young heart. Only advice is write it down. Too late, you already have.

Michaela said...

I love this post, Bonnie! You have a serious talent for writing. Your heart is so beautiful!

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